Product: Meredith Whitney — who predicted the 2008 economical disaster — reported on CNBC’s Squawk Box this week that sporting activities betting is to blame for A) adult males remaining single, B) men getting much less intercourse, and C) as a end result of “A” and “B” these exact same gentlemen will not be forming families and shopping for properties, thereby tanking the housing current market.

Hmmmmph.

Honestly, I think this is just the beginning. You check with me, athletics betting is the root lead to of dozens of societal and economic ills. Here are but a couple. (Remember to notice I predicted the 1996 fiscal disaster.) (Editor’s note: There was no 1996 economic crisis.)

Weather alter: You ever sense how scorching your cell phone gets when you are chaotic dwell-betting Thursday Night time Soccer? Properly, where by do you assume that heat goes? It doesn’t just dissipate. My styles display stay-betting provides .03 degrees (Fahrenheit) to global temperatures each and every year. Icebergs are melting as a final result. Bet on Tyquan Thornton anytime touchdown, get rid of a polar bear.

Weight problems: When was the last time you noticed a person doing the job out even though betting on a sportsbook application? This is simpler than connecting the dots with two figures.

Poverty: I suggest, this a person is self-explanatory to anybody who was betting on Tyquan Thornton to rating a touchdown.

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Ableism: All I’m indicating is it’s almost certainly time to retire the time period “handicap.”

Pretend Information: Oh, correct, sure, like I’m likely to believe those NFL damage experiences

Ignoring spouse and young children an hour just before lock for DFS contests: I imply, I would by no means, but I have heard of husbands executing this. (Relevant: Offering toddlers baths with a single hand although furiously late-swapping off the chalk with the other.)

Pandemics: Math is straightforward here. Sporting activities bettors continue to be in their residence, are not exposed to typical amounts of germs, then are pressured to leave their property just about every so usually (periods when a athletics bettor may possibly have to have to go away their property contain when the DoorDash app goes down, and … properly, I feel that’s it), are then blasted with germs, their immune system can not cope with it, novel viruses erupt. Seem out for my paper on this in a forthcoming version of JAMA.

And last of all …

Mass extinction activities: Think about it: There are a good deal of incredibly smart, math-centric, algorithm-using brainiac sorts out there betting on sports for a residing. So if all these nerds are active figuring out if betting the Cowboys laying 3.5 details versus the Eagles is a +EV wager, who’s jogging the numbers on possible asteroid strikes? Hmmmmmmm? Who? Consider about that when we’re blown to smithereens. 

And now, from nonsense to a lot more nonsense …

The +1000 or much more parlay of the 7 days

Now we’re -13. I’m feeling the pressure. To be fair, I was -16 last calendar year and gained this in equally 7 days 17 and the wild card round, so you should know that all hope is not misplaced.

This 7 days at DraftKings, it is Justin Fields in excess of 62.5 yards hurrying, the 49ers laying 11 to the Seahawks at home, Khalil Shakir over 31.5 receiving yards, and Javonte Williams about 62.5 hurrying yards. This comes in at +1057.

Rationale? Justin Fields’ speeding yards from the Lions in their previous three matchups: 147, 132, 104. The 49ers are evidently top-quality to the Seahawks and are plainly playing with a chip on their shoulder. The Chiefs have held No. 1 receivers down all yr, but secondary receivers have popped additionally, Shakir has cleared this amount 5 out of his final 6 online games. And Javonte Williams, assuming the recreation stays near, need to get fed early and normally.

The on-paper, no doubt, a few-group teaser that is sure to get rid of

Down to 6-7. That’s definitely all we want to know appropriate now.

This 7 days, at +160 at BetMGM, nothing stands out, but if I have to select … Niners providing 4.5 factors to the Seahawks, Colts getting 8 factors against the Bengals, and Saints even towards the Panthers. 

Favored that makes me anxious

Skipped this one — said the Texans produced me anxious as 3-place favorites. They defeat the Broncos by 5 details. Onward. Upward. 

This week? Right again to the well. There is no way the Chargers must be favored at “home” from the Broncos. The Chargers are a failed point out. If just about anything, this ought to be pick’em, not a subject goal. 

Participant props I like

Went 1-4 final 7 days, down to 18-27 — not terrific, Bob. This is a catastrophe. I certainly hope no 1 is reading this.  

This 7 days, effectively … just glance at my parlay card earlier mentioned. I definitely really like the Fields and Shakir overs, so let’s just stop there.

Did I gain the DraftKings Milly Maker?

What do YOU Feel?!?!?

My mortal lock 5-star only for my best clients can’t reduce assured very best wager of the 7 days

Pulled up to 5-8 just after taking the less than in the Texans-Broncos affair. This 7 days, I like in excess of 52 in the Eagles-Cowboys Sunday night time video game. No way possibly team can choose their foot off the gas listed here. No guide is protected. I count on fireworks.





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